I Offer Aspersions Regarding Your Heritage

Interesting article over on Wired about video game boss fights. I think my favorite bosses are probably the ones who taunt you openly. Best boss fight of all time has to be Psycho Mantis from Metal Gear Solid, though. The worst boss of all time is the beast from Resident Evil: Code Veronica who cannot be killed and you have to run in terror from. One or perhaps two hits is all it takes it to kill you and it is literally luck that keeps you alive. Both HB and I gave up on this game after being slain by this stupid, stupid “boss” forty bajillion times over and finally giving up for mental health considerations. Neither of us have ever actually finished the game as a result.

On an only semi-related subject as I was sort of browsing around Wikipedia reading about video game bosses, I started thinking about older games that I never got around to playing but often wish I did. Games like The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time which everybody says is the best Zelda (or the best game) ever. They even have a version I think for the Gamecube that I’m just too lazy to track down.

Which got me thinking about games I wish would be either remade or re-released for current systems as ports because I would like to give them a shot sometime.

• Resident Evil 2: Okay, I actually played this but it was a rental and I didn’t even get 25% of the way through. I tried to go back and play it on the Gamecube re-release but the graphics are so 1997 it was painful. It’s a shame because most of the series’ storyline (at least in terms of understanding the subsequent game plots) stem from this game. If anything needed the remake/facelift treatment, it would be this game. Maybe even a DS port would allow me to get over my graphic snobbery enough to push through.
• System Shock series: Adventure-style games that people swear scared the heck out of them. Count me in.
• Maniac Mansion/Sam and Max/Grim Fandango/Monkey Island: Lucasarts used to put out stellar PC games. I mean, I guess, because people are pretty hyperactive about them still to this day. So much so that they have a mechanism to allow them to be played on modern hardware. I never played any of them but they sure looked interesting and if they were available again (without hoops; I’m way too lazy for hoops) I’d definitely pick them up.
• Final Fantasy VII: Okay, I actually played this game. A lot. But I think I’ve explained before that I never finished and it still bugs me that I didn’t to this day. Of course now the graphics look dated but since it was the last FF game that was actually playable, I would sure love to see a facelift on this puppy. And please, like a re-released, sexified new PS3 version wouldn’t sell 200 bogrillion copies in half an hour. If you don’t believe me, are we reading the same Internet?
• Honorable Mention for Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, because I could probably pick it up cheap and play it on the backward compatible PS2 but am too dim to actually do so. Plus it wouldn’t suffer from the RE2 issues because it’s 2D sprite-based and so it probably looks pretty good. In fact, maybe I’ll do that. Yeah.

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